Today has been a tough day.
The day job is uninspiring, mundane and a trial to get through. I struggle to engage with any aspect of it. I cannot even suffer through the days with colleagues, since I work in a quiet office with just one other person who is often absent.
I am an accountant and I a) can't imagine how I tripped and fell into something such as this and b) can't comprehend how utterly different it is from my true love in life. Which would be books.
I adore books. I love every part of them - from the browsing and choosing of them; to the deciding which one to read next; to the cracking open of the first page and not knowing quite what is ahead of you. I love being transported to different worlds. I love being so frustrated with a book that I throw it down in disgust. I enjoy the use of words, the formation of sentences, the lushness of truly great prose.
Books are my sanctuary. They are my hiding place. They shield me from a world that is often too terrible to contemplate. They provide me with inspiration, regret, humble appreciation and melancholy.
Every time I come into work and struggle through my eight hours I have the knowledge that a book is always waiting for me.
To those authors who read this: you made this. I am eternally thankful.
Tuesday, 12 October 2010
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My sympathies. I suppose we can only keep our collective chins up!
ReplyDeleteIt's good to remember sometimes how important books can be to our emotional wellbeing. And what wondrous things they are!
ReplyDeleteI so feel your pain, my friend. Books never fail to cheer me up - taking a walk to the local W'stone's always helps or on the way home, taking that book out of your bag and shoving the day behind you...and then getting home and seeing all your own books - there is nothing like it.
ReplyDeleteHope you are feeling better soon. Mucho hugs.
Amen to that! Books have been one of the very few things to make dark times a bit brighter, and to help me get through the truly terrible times in life. There's nothing like leaving all the crap of the world behind in order to throw yourself into a new one!
ReplyDeleteOnly one thing to say to this Amanda - YOU'RE IN THE WRONG JOB!!
ReplyDeleteWarmest regards
Rob
P.S. Oh...and HEAR HEAR to BOOK LOVE!!
Alas! We escapists all suffer from the same disease, the day job, a meaningless yet necessary affliction that we must endure!
ReplyDeleteI am an engineer and my soul screams for release all day long; to return to what you call your sanctuary.
So sorry about the job, Amanda. I know how it feels to really, really, not want to do what you're doing (obviously not now :-)), and yes, it was and always has been books that keep me going. I hope you find some way to change it :-). {hugs}
ReplyDeleteSome days I know exactly how you feel. You're certainly not alone in this.
ReplyDeleteOh love we have all been there, it's not fun having to extract yourself from a lovely book at the end of the commute only to face tasks/people/meaninglessness we don't enjoy stretching ahead for what seems like forever. But take heart, it isn't forever and you're vastly intelligent - the world is your oyster. Plus I will send you some more books to cheer you up! X
ReplyDeleteYes, yes, yes. I agree with every word you wrote (except I'm not an accountant!)
ReplyDeleteAmanda
ReplyDeleteEloquently put. Although not as prolific reader as yourself, books are my 'special place'. Thanks for all the work you put into this blog.
I so understand how you feel! It took a major life upheaval to get me to writing full time, but I do NOT miss the soul-sucking day job I had before. The people were great, but the work sucked up all my creative energies.
ReplyDeleteI love this and completely agree. Though I have two fantasy worlds - my books and my crafting. Never happier than when I'm reading or up to my elbows in paint, glue, glitter and what have you.
ReplyDeleteStill at least we DO have these escapes - can you imagine what it would be like without?
Well, I a CFO who has spent the last 25 years doing accounting in one form or another, and adore books, when I'm not working I'm reading, when I'm driving I listening to an audio book, I collect them and surround myself with them, and each day try to read a bit at lunch and go to bed every night with one in my hands.
ReplyDeleteI know you very well.
I work in publishing and enjoy it very much, but I would have loved to have been an accountant. Perhaps we should trade places. ;-)
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